What I wore: pajamas for days; shirts that I found draped on the backs of chairs; inside-out sweatshirts
What I did beforehand: welcomed my sick husband home from a business trip, where, he said, one of his colleagues showed up sick.
Who went with me: Schwartz, who probably prefers me sick
How I got tickets: getting sick requires no tickets in advance
Why I saw this show: I think, really, that getting sick is part of the human condition
Where I sat: in bed
things that hurt before but now don't: toes, thighs, elbows, eye balls— Hamsteria d'Relish (@hamsterRelish) April 24, 2016
things that now hurt: neck, hair, lungs
Things that were sad: running out of tea; not being able to sleep; waking up too early; aches and coughing; missing normal weekend things; being visited by Team Hatred, who ran over our second "Bernie for President" sign and gave us a bit of a lawn job
Things that were funny: the dog freaking out about the thunder
Things that were not funny: the neighbors have a "Hillary for President" sign that's been up for months and no one has stolen it or run it over.
What it is: an upper respiratory infection or perhaps the flu
Earlier when I said my elbows didn't hurt? I was wrong about that. Also my toes. Officially, even the air around me hurts. Officially— Hamsteria d'Relish (@hamsterRelish) April 25, 2016
Who should see it: no one
What I saw on the way home: